We Teach Others How to Love Us

A blog for the woman ready to raise the bar on how she’s treated starting with herself.

The way you speak to yourself sets the tone. The way you hold your boundaries sets the rules. And the way you show up for your needs? That becomes the blueprint others follow.

We don’t just attract love. We teach it.

Every time you say “it’s okay” when it’s not… Every time you laugh off the thing that actually hurt you… Every time you overextend just to feel worthy… You’re teaching them something.

And babe, they’re learning. Fast.

Let’s teach for a second… People don’t always treat you how you deserve. They treat you how you allow.

This doesn’t mean it’s your fault when people are disrespectful. But it does mean your silence becomes consent. Your pattern becomes the path they walk.

So if you always answer the phone when they ghost for 3 days… If you keep loving them harder when they show up with less… If you keep making excuses for the things that trigger your wounds…

You’re not just staying in a cycle you’re reinforcing it.

Self-love doesn’t just change your relationship with yourself. It changes every relationship around you.

Now let me be real—reflection time.

There was a time I called it “loyalty.” Called it “holding space.” Told myself, “they’ll get it eventually.”

But they didn’t. Because I never changed the lesson.

I kept showing up as the woman who needed less. So they kept giving less.

It wasn’t until I raised my own standard with myself that everything shifted. I stopped entertaining people who didn’t speak my language: reciprocity, presence, effort, intention.

Now? I don’t have to beg. I attract what I embody. And I teach with every boundary I hold.

Journal Prompt: What am I currently allowing that doesn’t align with the way I want to be loved?

You are the standard. You are the reminder. You are the example of how love is supposed to feel.

Not desperate. Not diluted. Not confusing.

Loving you should feel like peace, not a performance.

Want to rewrite the story you tell yourself? Download the Dating with Discernment Energy Guide and start teaching from truth not trauma.

Learn more about conscious love at DavinaLiving.com